Thoughts on “It isn’t good to be alone”


I’ve been reading a lot these days and came across an interesting article called “It isn’t good to be alone”. Perhaps I should explain why I found it was interesting, besides that absolutely tantalizing title!

I’ve been single for a while and still struggling a bit with being rejected by someone I care deeply about. The whole situation led me on a very introspective journey. For a while now I have been praying for God to help me address deficiencies in my character. To be clear, I don’t mean deficiencies in any self-deprecating way. I mean that I have realized that as long as I live, there are things I can improve about myself; I’ll never be perfect but I can still aim for optimum.

A woman thinking

During my character-building journey, I realized that I had developed a subconscious idea that God would not bless me with a good man to love until enough of my deficiencies or attitudes have changed i.e. until I was “good enough”. For example, on the days I was depressed and just couldn’t pull myself together I used to tell  myself “God wouldn’t let you meet anyone if you continue with this ungrateful crying” or “No one would like you like this” or  even “You are not ready for any relationship if you can’t even be normal by yourself”. But after reading this article and some Bible scripture, my mind has drastically changed. (Thank God!)

Here is an excerpt from the article:

“Heaven knows God didn’t wait until I had it all together in my singleness to give me my husband. And I know many women experiencing infertility who struggle with the same idea. “What is the lesson I have to learn before God will give me a child?!” No, friend! Your sisters in Christ with husbands and/or children did not EARN that good gift by their obedience or faith…”

What a revelation! I was so glad to be reminded that I do not earn blessings with my works! And what a relief it was to realize that God can still bless me in my mess.

And then I remembered so many Biblical examples of how God used people who seemingly weren’t “ready” or “suitable”. Abraham and Sarah were ancient and barren when God said Abraham would be the father of many nations. Moses wasn’t a very good speaker yet God made him leader of the Israelites.David was the youngest of Jesse’s sons, with no royal blood, yet God had him anointed to be king. Peter was a fisherman, not a theologian, yet Jesus called him to be a disciple. The list goes on and on.

So I hope my little epiphany helped someone out there who needs to hear it. God loves you unconditionally, not dependent on where you are right now. I’ll continue trying to be a better person every day with God’s help and armed with the knowledge that He sees my effort and doesn’t reward me because of it but blesses me despite it.




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